I do.
I'm not sure where to start though. When I worked at the surf shop we sold sunglasses that were called happy lenses--no, let's start in the present.
I work two jobs now; at a bakery in the morning and a hotel at night. It's some miserable existence I'm sure, but wouldn't you know, I'm rather bemused by it. I find myself laughing constantly in my own delirium. Maybe it's the lack of sleep, mais je ne sais pas.
I have a secret weapon as it were, one that is really of any real substance in a city like LA. It needs to be almost always sunny, and on my break in the morning, already on my second meal for the day, I turn my face to the sun and close my eyes. There's different shades of darkness with your eyes closed, and in the sun it's the brightest. Blind man's light, and when I open my eyes, everything's blue, the whites are blue, the grays are blue, the red are blue, the yellows too.
That's when I smile and get giddy, and I remember those times at the surf shop, selling happy lenses. They had a blue tint to them in the sun. In the literature, the company told us seeing that tint blue releases melatonin in our brains, which is an antioxidant and our first defense against oxidative stress, whatever that is. It makes you happy. But you don't need sunglasses or a pill or prescription to get it, you don't need a doctor to figure it out. It's right there free for the taking, you just need to close your eyes and stand in the warm sun. There's precious few things that star won't cure. If you're not happy, it's not some grand mystery. Ask any sad plant, she'll tell you. If I were to worship anything it would be the sun.
I'm a buffoon, I know. It's much too easy for me to be happy these days.
